Sasha Nicole Unveiled
Your go-to destination for inspiration and heartfelt experiences spanning personal growth, business, love, and motherhood. Join me as I reflect on the transformative power of embracing life's evolution and your journey.
Sasha Nicole Unveiled
Prioritizing the Message Over Metrics
Welcome to the season opener of Sasha Nicole Unveiled. Listen to my candid confessions of why I had to take time to rediscover the heart of my message and the purpose behind the passion. It's a raw look at the emotional and financial toll of comparison, seeking validation that your work/craft matters, and how easily you can get caught up in focusing on the metrics rather than the message. I'm steering back to my true north—connecting with you through stories that support and uplift.
This is the starter episode of revealing my continued journey to stay present, cherish life's moments, and celebrate the evolution of identity and self-discovery.
My goodness, it has probably been a little over a year since you have seen me in this capacity of like recording a video or saying much of anything. Honestly. A lot has transpired. You know, life be life, and for all of us I'm no different. I had a baby. She is about to be almost six months and, wow, you know, having a baby at an older age is very different.
Speaker 1:As many of you know, my first child was almost 12, had severe postpartum depression after having her, and so this experience was actually significantly different, not only just in terms of support, in terms of financially, just a lot of different things, and just even my body, right. And so a lot of us, you know, don't talk about what it's like having a baby when you're pretty much almost 40. And it's like your body is a little bit different, right, and so I'm actually pretty nervous because it's been a long time that I've poured out any thoughts, any opinions, perspective, whatever you want to call it, in reference to just putting any type of message out there, and so, essentially, just getting to the point, I wanted to get back to the message, right, and because for a long time, when I say that, I mean that oftentimes people who are creatives, people who consider themselves influencers, people who feel like they have something to say, whatever that looks like. We get caught up sometimes in the metrics instead of the message, and so for me, for my experience, I got caught up in the metrics. I got caught up in losing the purpose and the foundation in why I started and why I started actually being transparent and sharing my stories and providing that authenticity in terms of who I am and what I think and what I believe, and the initial true foundation to help people, to really see them through times of darkness, to help people overcome various circumstances, to show people that there's so much relatability between all of us in this world and oftentimes sharing your experience can really help others, depending on the situation that they, too, are going through. And so, for many years, if you've seen me, you've seen that I have constantly put out things with the intention of providing insight and helping people. I mean it was from the curvy executive to thriving in. Your now was from the curvy executive to thriving in your now.
Speaker 1:I mean I've had so many different variables that I have put out, because I have constantly been in this search, in terms of my identity, of what that message was supposed to look like. And so one of the things that you know, just as a point, that I did wrong was that I always got focused in the details of what it should look like, what it should be called, how the website should be, all of these different things, rather than really focusing on just honing in on the craft and on the message, and I would get so distracted and wanting to make things, I guess, perfect, you know right. So owning that perfection that a lot of times exists within a lot of us. And then as a creative, no matter what it is that you're creative in the art that you feel you want to, you're proud of that and you want it to sound or look a certain way. And so then I had went into Fearless Influence and that was definitely really just fueled with so much passion because I just was like, on this role of just great energy, of just so many different things, that I'm like I want to help people overcome this fear. I would have so many people hit me up and be like you know, I'm just debilitated in this fear of this or of that. And so I was like, why don't I gather these people together and just speak with how they've overcome different things and so, and then I transitioned into just no longer being present about the message, and it wasn't intentional, it was just that I started, really, I guess, falling into the trap of what was being sold in reference to when you look on social media, when you read different things, and I felt like I had to have strategy, I had to have content creation, I needed a content calendar and you know, in working a full-time job because I do work a full-time job as well as my other organizations and things that I do I hire people to help me with, like this, content creation, how this should look and how that should look, and let me tell you that is money For real should look and how that should look. And let me tell you that is money for real, for real. Um, and although being able to write off certain expenses, it was just honestly a waste because, again, I got so wrapped up in you know the metrics instead of the message that I lost the passion.
Speaker 1:I lost the intensity of what this started for and what it was about, and so when you go from a place where you're initially trying to help people and then you move into considering on what that looks like in terms of how many people are viewing, if you can get a payout. You wanna see a return in your investment. You want to feel like everything you've poured into something wasn't in vain. And I know oftentimes people go in especially myself with that intention of these things don't matter. When you start putting countless time in and out, those things start to. They start to matter and you start to hear certain experts who are saying if you're not converting, what are you really doing? And I think that, at least for me, it's like you wanna have an answer, like you wanna feel like it matters, like it's something significant, when ultimately, the reality is is that it don't have to matter to nobody but you. Whatever it is that you're working on and doing, it doesn't have to convert into anything if that is not where your passion lies.
Speaker 1:My purpose led me down a path of a lot of money wasted, a lot of time wasted, a lot of missed opportunities in being present in certain moments, because every place that I would go, whether I'm overseas, whatever I'm doing, all of this is content. And they tell you that any conference, anything you've been at, they always talk to you about how so many moments of your life are so pivotal and so content-based and to capture that. And so oftentimes, what I've seen is that you can get so caught up in capturing the moment that you actually miss being present for the moment. And then, once again, the message that you intended now is not about a message. It's about the metric, it's about how many plays on the reel, it's about if you can get a payout. It's about how can you you transfer this into viewership, into likes, into fans, into whatever it is that you may be seeking or that you want to get from the work that you're putting in for the content that you're creating, because it is a lot of work. Content creation is not just easy, breezy. No, it is a lot of work, especially depending on the avenue and the lane that you're in in terms of the content that you're creating.
Speaker 1:And so you know, I had this incredible run with American Therapy, the premier podcast for Black Mental Health. We had this huge HBCU tour and then all of our co-hosts. We kind of just went our separate ways, not in a negative way, but we were doing different things in our lives. We had Star, who went to law school, dr T, who had her own business and had remarried, I mean so many different things that were happening with us.
Speaker 1:And then me, who I'm pretty much damn near getting divorced, and I'm just, life is life, and I'm doing other things, I'm having fun, I've lost all this weight, I'm entering this new space of life in a new body that I've never necessarily been in, and I'm losing my mind, like I'm just. I'm just, I'm experiencing myself in a way that I hadn't experienced. I'm, you know, being able to have different emotions and, you know, and fell in love and all these other different things that I just, you know, was a process for me and was something that I think very much needed to go through in terms of, you know, part of that journey, part of someone's story you know, everyone has a story in terms of how they've gotten to where they have, and so that was just part of mine. And so then, in coming back together and having my baby and then just taking that time off to really reflect and really see, you know visually just where we are in terms of social media, in terms of, you know, internet gangsters and things that people have to say, and just losing the focus of the positivity and things that people have to say and just losing the focus of the positivity and again that purpose. I had to make a decision in terms of, you know, getting back to the root and the root.
Speaker 1:The foundation, as I mentioned before, was wanting to help people, wanting to share different experiences, wanting to be able to say, like yo, I can help you get through this and it's not for you, not for anything that I need, but it's like I wanna see my community, I wanna see people succeed, I wanna see people win, I wanna see people know what resources are available to them. And so, for example, I mean things that I'll talk about in reference to, like PCOS and again what it was like in terms of having that significant weight loss. And with the PCOS, you know, there were moments I didn't have periods for months, and so my Chinese herbalist actually was the reason in which that started changing my cycles. And so just providing different insight into resources that are available that sometimes a lot of people don't know about.
Speaker 1:Professionally, finding a renewed interest, like, professionally, I do contracts. I, you know, help people, help small businesses, in terms of understanding proposal writing and also, you know, issuing actual awards and things like that, and so understanding that there's a lot of value that I think we often have that we're not necessarily cognizant of in terms of what we do as everyday people, because I was so focused in like, but I want to, I want to do this, I want to wake up every day and create and um, and I think some of us are very fortunate and lucky when that creation can turn into profit, when that creation, uh, is something that can uh, drive us and fuel us and pay the bills, but and sometimes it can, with consistency, turn into that. But oftentimes, you know, I think that maybe we're not focusing in the right areas and seeing that there's so many other things that we also are as people that can translate into momentum and into revenue for us. And so I actually took a step back and looked at man, like all this professional stuff I'm doing, like you know why have I never really explored that avenue in the way that I should? And so it's been a lot of different, you know, just complete inner healing and seeking, and even with the healing part, like I would think, oh, like I'm good, you know, I've consistently gone to therapy and didn't realize that there were still so many trigger points that were so unhealed that you know just when you think that you're kind of over the mountain, all of a sudden it'd be the smallest rock that'll knock your ass off. So you have to really look at also that consistency of your journey, of your inner healing journey, and I've spoken to that so much.
Speaker 1:People know that I'm very much about that because it really matters in the context of how we are as people, how we talk to ourselves, how we talk to other people, how we receive things, how we think about things. Just the angst, the fear, so many different avenues. And so I say all of that to say that finally overcoming even my own fear of like getting back on camera and having opinions and perspectives and sharing different ideas and sharing different ways that could potentially help someone is still like it's still scary for me at times because you know everyone sometimes is not going to welcome. You know what you have to say and so when you are putting it out in that social media realm, you definitely got to have some strong bones to you right and understand that. You know for some people this avenue of negativity is fun for them, and so for me also, even falling back from social media like I want to see. You know, everything's not going to be positive, so let's just, let's just be honest there.
Speaker 1:But for me, in terms of what I'm talking about, what I want to see, what I'm putting out, what I want to read about, what I want to hear about, you know, I've had to also shape that messaging, like you know and I Having all of the different aspects of like gossip or negative stuff about people who are failing, like that's not, that's not something that's going to propel wins for me. Right, you can learn some lessons from people, but it's not something that, you know, I think I want to. That's not what I'm a part of, that's not what I'm about, right, like I'm about like sharing the ways that hey, learn from these mistakes, but also here's how you can win. I'm not about the whole like oh yeah, let's talk about, you know, the gossip that's going on with the latest celebrity or any of that. Like that's just, that's just not me. But those are avenues that people are definitely fulfilling and and like doing and stuff of that nature.
Speaker 1:But for me and going forward in terms of modeling, it will be very consistent with what it's always been about and that's about just various different experiences in terms of you know from a small business and things that you should and shouldn't do, from contract, different questions that someone might have, from again sharing that journey, from the weight loss or PCOS, from the motherhood journey, of being, you know, older, and what do some of these changes and different things look like from you know, just all things that perpetuate, defining what success looks like for someone. And because that all that's subjective, it all looks different to everybody. And so I would say I want to be ambitious and be like, oh, every week, because there's so many different things that I could talk about, but I don't know, right and so, but for right now, ideally, I know for sure that I definitely want to release different things every two weeks, but the goal may be every week, but you know, now it's not about you know who views it. Now, it's not about that. Oh, it has to be strategic, it has to have this content, and I mean, I definitely was one of those people who got caught up in what I was seeing and the comparison and not wanting to be complacent and wanting to have that continued momentum rather than focusing on the mission. And it's so cliche because you'll hear people say, well, if you focus on the mission, you focus on what you love and you're like what I mean, and it really is true, when you focus on the mission, it feels different and it may not reach everybody and it may not make you any money, but from a purpose driven place and from a place of really finding the intention of your morale and just your values and who you are and the direction that you're going, it definitely rings true in terms of, you know, focusing on that and leaving the intricacies of like it having to be perfect and it needs to look like this behind and it needs to look like this behind. And what you will see is when people have that consistency of that focus, that is when it transforms into something that's just so much greater than probably what they've imagined. And so my intention will be to definitely be very clear and succinct in terms of certain topics that I'll be talking about.
Speaker 1:It'll be a video and then also audio release and I'm excited.
Speaker 1:I'm excited to kind of get back in the swing of things you know it's taken some time to kind of also like get back into me, finding me, you know, just as a mother, like as a new mother again, because you go through so many different ideas of yourself, of your body, of just the way that you want to feel Like it's a different avenue when you're like once again going through this process of taking care of someone who you know needs everything, night and day, and then just also like finding yourself, you know, beautiful again.
Speaker 1:Or there's so many different emotions that happens with pregnancy, not just for women, but even for men.
Speaker 1:There's a lot of emotions that I think women don't also acknowledge, that men go through too, in terms of having a baby and what life looks like for them and those changes.
Speaker 1:And so you know it's going to be, it's going to be a great ride, I think, and I'm excited to be moving back in a direction, on where it started, on just the purpose-driven place of the focus of like, hey, there's a great message to share and I'm happy to share that, and I'm happy to be in a space where it's more about being present in the moments that I'm having rather than constantly focusing on having to share them, because I think when you are in that space, there's a lot of moments you miss with people. There's a lot of moments you miss with your children. There's a lot of moments you miss with your significant other. There's a lot of moments you miss just as a person, because you're not even recognizing just the emotions and energy and everything that you feel and are when you're entering spaces, because you're thinking about what to capture and I got to tell you, sometimes the greatest moments are the ones that aren't captured.